In my experience as a military spouse, I am amazed at the amount of drama that some of us have in our lives. Maybe it’s for attention, maybe the drama helps us get through the day, but I can tell you that for a military family drama is the thing that makes lives harder.
Sure every single one of us has “gone there” at one time or another, especially on the days when we would rather not deal with our own life. Drama can be the distraction that helps us focus on something other than the laundry, the kids, the job - whatever task we’d prefer not to handle at that particular moment. Heck it can help us take a break from our lives can’t it?
However, when you get caught up in the drama of military life, the benefit of that conversation, that diversion, that fleeting moment, eventually goes away. What you are left with is the mess, the stress and sadly, the chaos. And isn’t that what we were trying to avoid in the first place?
So what do you do to protect yourself from this slippery slope? How do you end the drama so you can enjoy and improve your life? You take the following 3 steps.
Step 1: Engage with a purpose
We all love an engaging and fun conversation, but not at the expense of another. Gossip, negativity and “I have it worse than you” banter can seem harmless in the moment but becomes toxic to your relationships and your life. Meaningful and engaging dialog that lifts everyone up is the best means to keep drama away.
Step 2: Stop to THINK
If you find yourself going down the drama path you must Stop to THINK and ask yourself the following questions. If you can’t say “Yes” to each of these simple questions then walk away or shift the conversation until you can.
T - Is it TRUE?
H - Is it HELPFUL?
I - Is it INSPIRING?
N - Is it NECESSARY?
K - Is it Kind?
Step 3: Manage Your Reactions
Life happens and it’s natural to react to it. However over-reacting doesn’t help us at all; in actuality it puts intensity into every aspect of our lives creating stress, chaos and drama. Pay attention to how you respond to any situation that arises so you can determine the people, places, and things that trigger dramatic moments. Once you understand where drama comes from, you can learn new ways to respond that will help you interact with your life in a calmer more effective way.
Each of us has times in our life that can become dramatic, but how we choose to handle these situations will determine whether or not the drama takes over and prevents us from a life of calm and peace. By following these simple steps you will be able to see what creates drama in your life and eventually reduce it in the future.
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Known by military spouses around the world as The Direction Diva, Judy Davis is a motivational speaker, lifestyle blogger, advocate and author of Right Side Up: Finding Your Way When Military Life Turns You Upside Down. A military spouse herself, Judy blogs, writes and speaks with a passion for changing the hearts of the military community and shares T.I.P.s (Tools, Information, and Perspective) to help military families become stronger.
To connect with Judy, read her blog or obtain information about
speaking & keynote topics/seminars/programs visit:
http://thedirectiondiva.com (Inspiring Military Spouses)
http://livingthrucrisis.com (Helping Military Families Find Hope)
